Same old thing.....

I know from speaking to a professional that when one is unhappy or anxious as a 'protection method' they will revert back to old habits or ways of thinking. I myself am a victim of this. These past 6 months have been really great. The first two months it had seemed that I found myself. Unfortunately, it did not last and here I am being pulled back to same 'problems' and same obsessing negative thought processes. They are a lot better then have been in the past but here they are prevalent once again. They are completely irrational and illogical. Yet it seems I cannot simply acknowledge a thought and move on.

I have the tendency to dwell, dwell, dwell. It seems I start digging, digging, digging this giant hole that one day I won't be able to crawl out of. I don't need to dig. Not on this land. It is perfectly good land that can be put to good use as it is. Less digging and more watering. If anything this land can just grow. The capacity for this land to grow is endless. My mind is endless. And if I allow myself to take in new experiences as they come in the moment and then move on my mind will thrive. It won't stop growing.

I can do this. I have done it before and was the happiest I have been in gee who knows? I am going to start doing things in the moment. Accomplishing things bit by bit, piece by piece, moment by moment.

Mustering up some courage...maybe?

Alright. So here's the deal. My name is Megan. And I am a cute fun girl with a lot more to offer than just that. But the only way I can get anyone else to see that is if I see it for myself, first. Tonight I ran into this attractive gentleman who I see often because we have mutual friends. I have always found him attractive yet have never been able to muster up the courage to even speak to him until this evening when I did only after being egged on by my friend. It is so ridiculous. I am almost twenty two and when I see someone attractive I act like a twelve year old girl. I suppose it is not a bad thing but how will anyone see what have I to offer if I always act like that? That's just it, they won't. I am ready for a change. Megan Kathleen Weber is a smart, cute, fun, lovable, caring, and amazing girl. And it is about time I share that.

Si se puedes!

Today, I witnessed history. Along with the rest of the country. No, make that the rest of the world. Today a black man was elected President of the United States: Barack Obama. An American hero, an icon for the times. It is time for a change and I think our country may have finally realize that. And the simple fact that a black man was elected is a good indicator that we are as nation ready to face the adversities challenging us right now and change for the better. The better of the American people and the better of the world. All over the world countries were watching with their teeth clenched hoping that Obama would be our next President of the United States. And he is. We did it. We recognized the need for change and did it.

The charismatic Barack Obama put it simply "This is your victory." This is yours, mines, his, and anyone else's. Barack Obama will change the course of our history and already is. So I congratulate the American people. This is our country and finally after a long eight hours in a downward spiral: America will make us proud. I can proudly say that I am from the United States.